Violence Against Women Prevention Program
womenscenter.uconn.edu/consent201
Group Agreements
- Share the message not the messenger
- Self-Care and Community Care
- Move up, Move back.
- We acknowledge intent while addressing impact
- Check-in rather than check out
UCONN Consent Definition
- Consent is an understandable exchange of affirmative words or actions, which indicate a willingness to participate in mutually agreed upon sexual activity.
- Consent must be informed, freely, and actively given.
- It is the responsibility of the initiator to obtain clear and affirmative responses at each stage of sexual involvement.
- Consent to one form of sexual activity does not imply consent to other forms of sexual activity.
- The lack of negative response is not consent.
- An individual who is incapacitated by alcohol and/or other drugs both voluntarily or involuntarily consumed may not give consent.
- Past consent of sexual activity does not imply ongoing future consent.
UConn Dairy Bar
We'll need 3 volunteers!
Your facilitator is the president of UCONN's Puppy Rescue club. Our volunteers are excited members of the club. You all love being a part of the club and hope to be the president one day. This is very important to you.
The club president is going to ask each of you, if you would like to go to the Dairy Bar.
The mindset of each student is the following:
- Volunteer 1: Wants to go
- Volunteer 2: Does not want to go
- Volunteer 3: Does not want to go
What does a Healthy Relationship look like?
- Maya and Howard have been dating for 2 years. They go to different universities 2 hours away, they make a plan to see each other at least once a month and more for special occasions like birthdays. Maya has decided to study abroad next year and is worried about the impact the distance will have on their relationship. Howard reassured Maya that they would video chat whenever she’s available and he encouraged her to explore the country she will be studying in.
- Renee has been Billie’s supervisor for about a year. They have been dating for 9 months. Billie just discovered that Renee had been cheating on them with another co-worker. When Billie confronted Renee, she said it was Billie’s fault for being uninterested in sex lately.
- Jerome, Kelvin and Marques have been dating for 2 years now. Recently, Kelvin has been feeling left out and like he’s not as important in their relationship. Kelvin brought this up to Jerome and Marques. Jerome and Marques listened and offered to work on making Kelvin feel more included.
- Janelle and Octavia, both college sophomores, have been dating for 6 months. Janelle asked Octavia to unfollow all of her exes on Instagram, expressing that it would make her feel more secure in their relationship. Although Octavia was initially reluctant, she eventually agreed to Janelle's request. However, Janelle later noticed that Octavia was still following an ex from middle school and brought it up in a conversation and expressed that Octavia does not truly love her.
Reese & Taylor
Part 1
Two months before Student Orientation, Reese received a social media friend request from Taylor, who was getting ready for their junior year at UConn. Reese thought Taylor was cute and didn’t know anyone on campus, so they accepted the request. After discovering how much they had in common, they started exchanging text messages every day. Taylor would talk about the professors they liked, the dining halls that served good food, and shared funny stories about their friends who they wanted to introduce Reese to.
Taylor picked Reese up from the airport and even helped them pick classes for the semester, one of which Taylor would be the TA for. Taylor even brought Reese food and medicine when they got sick with the flu.
Part 2
Reese and Taylor got in the habit of walking to class together. One day, Reese’s friend Casey joined them. Later, Taylor told Reese that they didn’t like Casey, saying that Casey was a bad influence on Reese.
One afternoon, while Reese was asleep in their own room, Reese woke up to find Taylor in there, going through their phone. When Reese confronted Taylor about going through their phone, Taylor got angry at Reese for texting Casey. Taylor stormed out, and later, when they spoke, Reese apologized for making Taylor angry. Taylor told Reese they would have to make it up to them later.
That night, they went to a party together. Reese was tired after a long day of studying, arguing with Taylor, and then partying. They were making out a little after the party in Taylor’s dorm, but then Reese said they just wanted to go to sleep. Taylor wanted to have sex, and when Reese said no, Taylor again accused them of cheating with Casey. Taylor was very angry, and Reese didn’t want to make them even angrier, so they stopped resisting.
Part 3
The next morning, Reese left Taylor’s apartment. They told Taylor they didn’t like what happened the night before and didn’t appreciate how controlling and manipulative Taylor had been. Reese made it clear that they wanted to break up. Later, Taylor showed up at Reese’s apartment with a dozen roses. Reese's friends, not knowing what had happened, commented on how romantic Taylor was. Reese then tells their friend what happened, and Reese’s friend says “That sounds like a rape. I’m sorry that this happened. It wasn’t your fault, but next time, call me immediately when something like that happens, what can I do to help you?”
Reese later reiterated to Taylor that they wanted to end the relationship. Taylor then threatened to hurt themself if Reese didn’t change their mind, and when that didn’t work, Taylor told Reese they would fail them. Reese is unsure what to do next to get out of this situation.
Resources & Support:
Consent 201 Survey
In-Power
In-Power is a weekly student-led support group dedicated to building a gender-inclusive community that welcomes victim-survivors of sexual assault, stalking, and/or intimate partner violence at any point in their healing process. Through a focus on empowerment, autonomy, and resilience, the group aims to help participants claim agency over their own stories and experiences, as well as the direction of the group. We’ll be accomplishing this with a variety of discussion topics and self-care methods.
Meetings will likely consist of discussion surrounding these topics, an activity related to the topic, and time and ideas for self-care practices. However, this group is open to change depending on the needs of its members and we anticipate things will shift slightly based on group dynamics and feedback.
In-Power is open to any UConn student regardless of gender identity. We are run out of the Women’s Center, but in no way does this mean that you must identify as a woman in order to be in the space. If you are interested in joining the group, please reach out to facilitators Melissa and Bella at: in-power@uconn.edu
CT Alliance to End Sexual Violence
CT Coalition Against Domestic Violence
10 Everyday Things You Can Do to Eliminate Gender Based Violence
How to Support a Friend or Family Member Who Has Experienced Gender Based Violence
Want to learn more
Get Involved at the Women's Center